Safety and security at home

Meeting and living with new people can be fun and exciting but isn’t always easy. There may be times when you face personal challenges or issues in the home.

Security pointers for living with others

It’s always important to remember a few security tips when living in shared arrangements like flatting or within the halls.

  • External doors should not be propped open—that’s an open invite.
  • Check that you lock external doors at night, when home alone or when you leave during the day.
  • Don’t open the door to visitors you cannot see or don’t recognise.
  • Let your flatmates know where you’re going and when they can expect you home.
  • Close your curtains when you are dressing.
  • Don’t leave your valuables lying around where they can easily be seen from outside.
  • Lock the door to your room if people who you don’t know may be coming and going.

Issues with flatmates and friends

If you have an issue with a flatmate or friend, try to talk it over with them first. Having disagreements is part of life, and university is no different.

  • Talk to the person about how their actions are affecting you.
  • Don’t get into accusations—it’ll descend into an argument pretty quickly.
  • Think of solutions that can accommodate the interests of all involved—in other words, don’t list all the things they’ve done wrong. Explain how you think things could work between you.

Check out the University’s Connect Well resources, which features information that may help you stay connected, with tips on problem sharing, friendships, conflicts, and talking about your feelings.

Talk with hall staff if you’re in University accommodation, or connect with the Tauria—Student Interest and Conflict Resolution team. If you need independent advice and support with any tenancy or flatting issues, you can also contact the VUWSA Advocates.

Personal issues

Personal issues such as academic stress, alcohol or drug abuse, mental health challenges, and eating disorders can strain relationships in your living environment, friendship group, or community. These issues do not just affect one person. If things go wrong or just don’t seem right, or you simply feel isolated, there are plenty of people you can talk to about whatever is on your mind.

If you’re worried about a friend or feel the behaviour of another resident is affecting others, you have the right and responsibility to seek help both for yourself and the other person.

Connect with the Tauria—Student Interest and Conflict Resolution team if you have a concern.

Abuse at home

In some situations, people living together engage in intimidating or harmful behaviours towards other members of their household. This doesn’t always equate to physical violence—abuse can be emotional, too.

Examples of domestic abuse are:

  • controlling someone, such as their finances, friendships, social media
  • damaging someone’s relationships or reputation
  • harassing or stalking someone in person or online
  • calling someone names
  • putting someone down
  • manipulating or intimidating someone
  • deliberately isolating someone.

If you think you’re experiencing domestic violence but aren’t sure, use Are You Okay’s Check it out tool. If you are experiencing domestic violence:

  • talk to someone
  • go somewhere safe
  • access support
  • consider accessing protection.

If there is the potential that your environment could be unsafe then have a safety plan. Know how to safely access your keys, bank account and money, and which safe places you can go to if needed. Have an emergency bag.

Find out more about recognising and dealing with domestic and family violence.

Community services for domestic violence